


And Although Our Kingdom Awaits...

by Zacheria



Category: Gone Home
Genre: F/F, Feels, Gone Home (Game), LGBT, Sam/Lonnie - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-12
Updated: 2013-10-12
Packaged: 2017-12-29 04:38:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,273
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1000993
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zacheria/pseuds/Zacheria
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sam is gone. Sam is gone, and you wish that you had been able to talk to her... one last time.</p>
            </blockquote>





	And Although Our Kingdom Awaits...

**Author's Note:**

> First.... nevermind second Fic of the Fandom and My first Fic on Ao3. Wrote on 1 in the morning sleepy neurochemicals.

You close the journal with a soft crack of its bindings. Sam is gone. That is the one thought that will not leave your head. It took you almost an hour to reach the attic. Reading the notes, listening to the tapes... exploring the house, empty and desolate. Your learned more about your family in the at one hour than you had in your entire life of living in Forest Grove. The sharpied on title reading “Letters to Katie” is stained with tears. You stand up, legs shaking, and grab the journal, holding it to your heaving chest. You had consciously left every light in the house on, scared by the rare thunder storm raging against the windows and roof, so acute in the lifeless silence of the house. You hear the usually comforting pitter-patter of the rain on the roof, directly above you. Now though... now it sounds like desolation. You grab the chain and pull the light off, going back through Sam's dark room, shutting off the red lamp.

You work your way back through each room, turning off the lights one by one. Bathing the antique rooms in semi-silent darkness. You stand in front of the phone in the foyer; your hand resting near one of the seemingly hundreds of notes scattered like pages around the house. You debate calling your parents at their summer get away. But then slowly come to realize through the tiredness of your reeling mind that you don't know what you would say, and that you didn't have the number on hand. Even if you did, you didn't want to walk through the house anymore. You aren't tired, having slept on the plane and suffering from major jet lag. But.. Sam is gone. Your little sister has followed her heart. Just like you had in going to Europe. You walk with crying eyes to where your suitcases lay, gifts that will never be given weighing them down you lock the door behind you putting the key underneath the Christmas duck. You sit down heavily with your back against your rucksack, the paper name tag from the airport scratching at your neck. You can't control the whimpers anymore, and let out a mix between a shout and a whine along with your hiccuping tears. You hug Sam's letters to your chest, resting your forehead on your slightly dried pants. Sam is gone. You were too late to stop her. And honestly... would you have even been able to stop her from seeing Lonnie? No. no. you are no stranger to love as a teen and you know that Sam did what she had to. Lonnie better treat your sister with the love and kindness she deserves. You had never really given any thought to homosexuals or gays or lesbians or whatever umbrella term they use now. It just wasn't something crossed your mind. Strangely though, reading through Sam's eyes.. you understand that they are people in love, just like everyone else. You are angry at your parents for dismissing Sam's earnest love as a phase. Even if they didn't agree with the principle you can't hide from the real world by covering your eyes damn it! Even if Sam hadn't left tonight she would have left eventually, no one wants to live in a house with people who lie to themselves about who you are, living in fear that maybe one day they'll change their minds and force you to repent your sins or other such ilk. Even you, straight as you are can see the cruelty and unfairness of that. Hell, you would have driven her to meet Lonnie yourself. You just wish you could have told her, “Its okay To be who you are Sam, I love you” you might never have that chance again. And that honestly was the heart rending truth of tonight. And the tomorrows to follow.

Salem was the perfect place to fade out of, as the capitol it holds the state records office and many other businesses that would be beneficial to an almost 18 year old. (intellectually you knew that they would probably move to Portland or Seattle though). Oregon, while not the largest state, had miles of rural land and forests, hitchhikers and mountaineers and runways abound in cities and highway roadsides alike. Sam and Lonnie lost among them. Only to surface by choice or by law. (you prayed for the former).

With heavy thoughts and wet cheeks your eyes start to droop closed, weariness never experienced by you weighing them down with stones. When they open again the gray morning light filters through the frosted glass and the distant ringing of the telephone wake you. Running inside you grab the phone with clammy freezing fingers, still wet by tears.

“Sam? Is that you?” it's mom, you can hear dad mumbling something like (its eight she's probably not up yet.)

“N-no its Katie.”

“Oh my gosh honey how are you!?”

“...” should you tell them about Sam? Of course you should, but anger and a pang of regret rips through your thoughts.

“Katie?” you can hear the smile drop from her voice.

“I'm... well... I'm okay I guess. But um...” you bite your lips, they're chapped from the cold. “Sam's gone.” gone home. You hear mom rousing dad with worry.

“What do you mean gone?” her voice is shaking.

“Her car was gone last night and I couldn't find your number, she left a note on the door. It doesn't say where she went.” you give them the news monotonously.

“Oh God......” you hear mom give a quiet sob and your hear dad take the phone.

“Katie, are you sure she's gone? Do think she just could have run out of gas or was staying at a friends?”

“I'm sure dad.” you decide to divulge one bit of information. “...She's with the girl she loves dad, I think she'll be okay.”

“What!? She's with... that girl was always a bad influence on our little Sammie! She-” you have no patience for his bullshit right now.

“Dad. Shut up. I read Sam's letters to me. She loves Lonnie and I support her. I came home to an empty house in the middle of a storm unsure of everything until I read that journal; Sam Loves Lonnie in a way that you or I or mom could never understand. So shut up, Sam is gone because you made her feel as if she wasn't welcome in her own house. She belongs with Lonnie dad, this is your fault, and mom's. The both of you are so wrapped up in your own shit that you ignored her for months. I know about your books dad, I know about mom's thing with Richard. So shut up and accept that Sam probably never wants to see you again.” some of those thing you don't mean, but they are indiscernible from the truth. Your dad breathes heavily through the phone, in rage or sadness or both. And, as if fate is laughing, the power cuts out, leaving you in the dark house with the cold phone clasped in your hand. You set it back down with a half ring from the bell inside it. Angry, you bang the table, hard. Causing your hand to give a pained twinge before the short ringing of the thud in your ears stopped.

An hour later the power turns back on, you're sitting on the stairs, reading Sam's words for the tenth time. The phone rings suddenly and you rise tiredly, your back stiff from sleeping sitting up for the night. You pick up the phone, not thinking it could be your parents calling back. But.. you had a sense that they wouldn't.

“Hello?” you say uncertainly.

“Katie?” oh god its Sam its Sam

“Sam!? Are you okay?” you nearly shout into the phone

“..yeah.. definitely.” you can hear the smile in her voice. You smile too.

“Is there anything you need?” there's silence for a time. No more than ten seconds.

“..Did you read my letters?” she asks, quietly enough that I can hear cars passing by on a street near her and the breathing of someone else.

“Yeah. Is Lonnie okay too?”

“Yeah, she's okay too. But um... are you... angry with me?” the first word from your lips is:

“NO! no. of course not. I understand you love her Sam. If you ever need anything... I'll help you.” she laughs a little

“You mean you'll help me run away?”

“yeah. I will. Do you need money for gas or food?”

“No. I brought my birthday stash, it should last a while if we budget it. Lonnie can get a job since she's of age. But... I do want to see you though, one last time.” you zip up your jacket.  
“Where to?”  
I'mcominghomei'mcominghome,telltheworldthat'i'mcominghome

 

Portland really is beautiful, although parts of it could be very scary. Sam and Lonnie had spent the night in the back seat of Sam's car somewhere in the pearl district (the rich, safer part of town) you ride the MAX to them, dressed in your rumpled travel clothes and tear stained jacket. Your face probably looks like a mass of mosquitoes attacked it through out the night, puffy and blotchy. Sam had given you her license plate number, model, and make of her car but stupidly on your part, had forgotten to ask the color. A Toyota Corolla. 165-EZH you spot it outside a library. Of course. A tall girl with bright red hair is standing next to your sister, short, blond and wearing an old sweatshirt from Forest Grove High School that belonged to you when you were in track. You run from the bus stop to them.

“SAM!” you shout, startling the both of them. She looks around and finds you running towards her. A grin lights up her face and she jumps into your arms.

“Katie! How was your trip back?” she asks when you separate.

“Awful, we got held up in Chicago and L.A then when I finally make it home, its dark and I have no idea where anyone is. Next time you run away, leave your journal somewhere I can find it easily.” you're joking.. mostly. but about 40% serious. She looks sheepish.

“Sorry.. I was... in a hurry.” she looks at Lonnie, and they make eye contact, love and the lingering feeling of desperation swathes the air between them with heavy atmosphere. It becomes quite clear that they are “lost in each other's eyes” and here you thought people just... didn't do that. But.. meh what do you know? You wave your hand in front of her face, she blinks and looks back at you. You pull your wallet from your pocket and give her a hundred dollar bill (changed back from Pounds, from Franks from... ugh. Next time you go to Europe you hope they make some kind of all encompassing currency.) She looks like she about to protest when you shove into her fingers.

“Take it.” she nods, and smiles

“Thanks...”

“Just get a message to me somehow and I’ll get you more.” you say, daring her to argue. She doesn't. “Now... Lonnie?” you take a step forward toward the girl who holds your sister's heart on a precarious perch. She looks almost nervous. Almost, her pierced lip and eyebrow betray that impression. (an addition since that picture in 94') she sticks out her hand and gives yours a firm shake. (taught by a businessman no doubt)

“Katie.” She says, her voice almost husky and just a tinge below alto. You can definitely imagine her being in a punk rock band. She clears her throat and stuffs her hands into the pockets of her jeans, slipping her thumbs through her belt loops.

“Take care of Sam okay? She's the only sister I’ve got, and I don't want to find her dead in ditch somewhere off I-5.” she nods, her blue eyes steely. She stands up straight and puts her fingers to her brow.

“Yes ma'am.... and I swear that'll be the last fucking time I ever salute people ever again.” she says, finishing the salute. You laugh a little, sense of humor lost somewhere inside your addled brain.

“Good. And Sam.. I love you, and I will always love you, no matter what choices you make or where your life takes you.” a walking talking Hallmark card. yep. Katiemark, new brand of heartfelt cheesiness. Sam smiles and tears up anyway.

“Yeah...” she hugs you tightly, cracking your tight upper back. You don't care and hug her back just as strongly. “See you around. I'll... send you stuff when I can.” she is trying not to cry and failing as tear roll down her pale cheeks. 

You remember that you threw a bunch of your gifts for her into your backpack at the last minute before running to catch the local bus to the MAX. you give each and every one, telling her the stories of each one and she cradles them in her arms, depositing some to Lonnie when they became overflowed. You stand there for hours laughing at your American mishaps in Europe and your measly attempt at communication. Eventually, you run out of stories and the laughter fades. You hug her one last time and start to walk back to the bus stop. Not before Lonnie gives Sam a kiss that almost made your knees weak as you stepped onto the bus. They clambered back into Sam's car and Your bus turned around the corner of MLK blvd. Hopefully, the house won't seem empty when you return home.


End file.
